"Did you order the motivational seminar by Forrest Gump?"
- Douglas: Well, there's always weddings. I met all three of my wives at weddings.
- Martin: Really?
- Douglas: Well of course. The third one I met at MY wedding...which was a trifle awkward.
- MARTIN: Well, we can sit in the plane, or we can sit in the rain.
- DOUGLAS: Can’t we sit in the car or sit in a bar?
- MARTIN: Douglas.
- DOUGLAS: I’m sorry. I thought we were staging an impromptu tribute to Dr. Seuss.
- Martin: Standard Operating Procedure... Evacuation in event of smoke or fire in cabin
- Set parking break.
- Arthur: Mhm.
- Martin: Shut down engines.
- Caroline: Good idea.
- Martin: PA announcement.
- Douglas: Yup.
- Martin: First officer leaves through the nearest exit.
- Douglas: You bet he does and enters nearest bar...
- Martin: Captain dons cap, enters cabin to assist passengers.
- Caroline: Captain does what?
- Martin: Assists passengers! What, what's so funny?
- Douglas: No, before that?
- Martin: Captain dons cap, enters cabin ---
- Douglas: HAHAHA Dons cap?
- Caroline: Captain DONS cap!
- Douglas: Oh yes, you HAVE to don your cap before dealing with a fire!
- Caroline: Otherwise, how would the fire know who the captain is?!
MARTIN: Oh, Douglas, I thought of another one this morning.
DOUGLAS: Oh yes?
CAROLYN: What are you doing this time?
DOUGLAS: Books that sound more interesting with the final letter knocked off.
CAROLYN: What have you got so far?
DOUGLAS: “Of Mice and Me” and “Three Men in a Boa”.
CAROLYN: Ah, ah: “Far from the Madding Crow”.
DOUGLAS: Oh, very good, we’ll have that, and what’s your new one, Martin?
MARTIN: (proudly) “The Hound of the Baskerville”. (pause) I’ve taken the s off!
DOUGLAS: Almost good. Certainly better than when you took the s off “The Mill on the Floss”, to make “The Mill on the Flos”.
okay when Martin said the “The Hound of the Baskerville”, I lost it, it was just to perfect. God Bless You Captain Creiff, John Finnemore, and Benedict Cumberbatch.