March 2012
131 posts
“Good evening ladies and gentlemen. We are now halfway through our flight from Hong Kong to Limerick, and I just thought I’d let you know that I. Am. Bored. Bored, bored, bored, bored, bored. We are, unbelievably, still flying over Russia, which continues to be stupidly big. Really enormous. Far bigger than necessary. We’ve been in the air now for about a week. And it doesn’t look like we’ll be landing until the last syllable of recorded time. So, if anyone on board knows any card tricks, ghost stories, or would like to have some sex, please do make your way to the flight deck. Thank you.”
—Roger Allam as Douglas in John Finnemore’s Cabin Pressure (via luunacyy)
Qikiqtarjuaq
The-Sociopaths-Have-10-Ant (Izzy)
Qikiqtarjuaq ~ Lyrics by The-Sociopaths-Have-10-Ant
Lyrics…
It starts with a q and a q and a q,
There are three q’s and only one u.
Which actually comes after the j.
Oh passenger, listen, passenger hey
Today is your lucky day. Grab your pogo stick
And hop aboard GERT-I
For…
CHORUS:
Qikiqtarjuaq, Qikiqtarjuaq, just saying it can give ya a heart attack
Qikiqtarjuaq, Qikiqtarjuaq you see
Just MJN Air, you and me….
We fly through the skies, yes that’s true
Arthur welcomes you to the cabin crew
And a hundred otters will wave at you
Between polar bears and surprising rice
You find that flight deck games are nice
While we casually avoid a mountain made of ice
While headed for…
(chorus)
Martin is the pilot of plane
Douglas just likes to be a pain
And Carolyn thinks Arthur’s a bit insane
Little things in life make us happy
like an apple does for Arthur Shappey
And playing yellow car brilliantly
Simon says is a game we play
And if we can we won’t divert today
But I smell smoke on the flight deck anyway.
While headed to…
(Chorus)
For this to end, we’d rather not…
Because we all are emotionally
Invested in this air dot.
(love to the Air Dot!)
- MARTIN: Are you about to propose to me?
- DOUGLAS: It pains me to break your heart Martin, but no.
- AUDIENCE MEMBER: Aww.
